Ray of Light (The Incandescent Series Book 1) Page 23

  ‘Hi team,’ Miles’ nostrils flare and he lifts his chin up with pride.

  I've always thought his righteousness was sickening and delusional—but now, maybe he's always earned that privilege.

  Eli pulls Xander backwards and lunges himself at Miles, their fists punching each other’s backs—it's a quick and manly hug. ‘It's good to see you Miles!’

  ‘NORA?’ Xander calls darting his head around in search, ‘NORA!’

  Miles looks towards a door beside the fireplace, I'm assuming to a bedroom. Xander barges through the bedroom door without a single knock. Miles looks across all of us in the room and swallows hard. I bet he did not expect this ambush. For the first time ever, I feel sorry for him.

  ‘How did you find us?’ he asks.

  ‘Where is she?’ Xander flies out of the room.

  ‘In there,’ Miles furrows his brow with his hands up in surrender. ‘Isn't she?’

  Xander lowers his brow. ‘Where is she Miles? What have you done?’

  ‘Wait! She’s gone?’ Miles checks the room for himself.

  Xander shoves a piece of paper into his back pocket and re-grips the portal orb. ‘I’m going to try again.’

  ‘Her bag is missing, she’s gone.’ Miles says leaving the room.

  ‘Let’s go!’ Xander commands.

  As I step forward to do what he says, Eli makes a face and grabs the note out of Xander’s pocket.

  ‘Eli!’ Xander glares.

  ‘We’re a team right?’ Eli looks between Xander and Miles. ‘Right?’

  Xander blinks as though he doesn’t understand the question.

  Eli hands the note to Miles. ‘This came from in there.’

  ‘Dear Miles. I'm sorry I had to leave without you. I figured out what I have to do, and I have to do it alone. Don't come after me... oh no!’

  ‘Oh no what?’ Xander spits. ‘WHAT?’

  I flinch, I've never seen him this mad before. Miles closes his lips tight and shakes his head.

  Viv sniggers.

  I stare at her. It’s not exactly a moment for humour.

  ‘Something funny, Vivian?’ Xander asks, not taking his eyes off of Miles.

  ‘I find it amusing. It’s taken him five whole years to show us all his true colours.’ Viv squints her eyes at Miles.

  I look once again to all the people in this room. Miles, hurt and concerned as he reads the note over and over hoping new words take shape. Xander, chest puffed yet so obviously anxious. Viv, strong and allusive, and maybe just a little bit hysterical. Eli, still tired—but of what I'm not so sure—of lack of sleep, of the split team, of everything? Ross stands behind Xander, trying to stay out of the way of conflict. And me, as fragile as ever, holding my forearm across my waist, gripping tight to my elbow—I wish Adam was here, I felt calm when he was with me. And as I tilt my head studying each of us like specimens in a jar, I realise we are exactly that—all just fish in a pond, who've realised they have no water. We are all flapping about frightened, too busy wondering where the hell we are laying to realise we are not alone and all the sharks are eating us one by one.

  ‘Oh no, I trust him,’ Miles says. ‘It's you I should have been wary of.’

  ‘Ha!’ Viv scoffs. ‘You've got no idea!’

  Then without warning, Miles is looking at me, ‘I want to let you know Kate, I don't blame you for what you did. You were scared and alone and needed someone to trust. I'm sorry for… everything.’

  I blink, once, twice, three times—then I nod, because I forgive him. I hope Xander forgives me, for trusting and helping those I shouldn't have. And just like that I am no longer an Upriser, I am with Palladium.

  ‘Are you going to apologise to me now?’ Viv steps forwards and light streams into the corner of my eye. I glance sideways out the window, daylight threatens to uncover the night’s shadows, to shine a light on all that is wrong and evil and self-serving in this cabin.

  ‘What for?’ Miles answers indignantly.

  ‘Seth's life is on you Miles.’ The tears in Viv’s eyes glisten from the rising sun.

  ‘You don't think I know that Viv? You don't think that is something I've lived with every day for the last five years?’ He reaches to cup her shoulder but she doesn't want his guilt, she shakes his hand off.

  ‘And what about Xander's parents? Did you tell him that was your fault?’

  I see Xander lean forward, rolling on his toes readying for more fight but I grab his arm—this isn't the fight he's looking for. I mouth 'wait'. A silent conversation between siblings, it lasts only two seconds but that's all we needed.

  ‘My fault? I only did what I thought was right at the time. Yes, I told them where Xander was but I also warned them against your people and the sociopathic depths they go to for their beloved “peacekeeping”. Xander and Kate's parents were killed by your people, Viv!’ Miles’ finger points at her in accusation.

  ‘Viv?’ Xander is man enough to give her a chance to explain.

  ‘He's lying Xander, they would never do that! We are good people!’ Viv says it with conviction, she believes it. I believe she believes it.

  ‘You’ve been brainwashed,’ Ross speaks for the first time since we got here.

  ‘Don’t give me that rubbish! I think I would know right from wrong Ross. I’m not some flaky changing sides type like you obviously are.’ It almost seems like Viv is grasping onto the edge of a cliff, knowing she’s about to fall at any moment.

  ‘At least I don’t follow someone blindly just because they pander to your ego like some spoiled brat.’ Ross fires back.

  ‘What is that supposed to mean?’

  ‘How obvious do you want to be? You follow David because all he had to do was reassure you of how fabulous you are and next minute you’re doing everything he requires of you… the only difference between him and your parents is that they actually wanted a good life for you.’ My head spins at Ross’ revelation. Is that why Viv does everything Nichols wants? Because I can totally see that effect he would have on someone who felt like their parents didn’t understand them.

  ‘Ross!’ Xander sneers. ‘This doesn’t change the fact that Palladium killed my parents!’

  My blood boils. I open my mouth to tell him different but Miles beats me to it. ‘We didn’t! As I said, that was the Uprising.’

  Viv throws her hands in the air. ‘Ugh, give it a rest Miles, no one believes you!’

  ‘I do,’ I whisper but no one hears me.

  ‘All this arguing isn’t helping the fact that Nora is missing guys!’ Eli pipes up. ‘Can we just put a pin in this who killed who thing until we find our friend, you know Nora? We can all agree on her, can’t we?’

  Xander clutches the portal orb tighter at the sound of her name.

  ‘I care about Nora,’ Viv pouts. ‘But I don’t like being accused of being a murderer when the real murderer is standing here unscathed.’

  ‘Barely unscathed.’ Miles dabs the side of his mouth, the cold drip of blood pours from his lip, falls down his chin and smears his neck in red.

  I cover my ears, this is getting ridiculous. I hear their mumbled voices going back and forth over and over and over again. They argue about things they believe with their whole heart but I know the truth, and some of them are wrong. Viv is wrong. I don’t want to talk about it though, I wanted to talk to Xander in private. I want to go home and smell the scent of my parents and curl up on my bed for a whole month until I feel semi-normal again. I step back until I’m stopped by the futon as my calves hit it. I still hear them bickering, I can’t take it anymore.

  ‘STOP IT!’ I scream.

  I look up to everyone staring at me.

  ‘How did you know to find me?’ I face Viv now and as strong as I think I am I can't stop my chin from quivering. ‘You conveniently found me right after they were killed.’

  ‘He told me. David told me it happened, he said Palladium killed your parents for asking too many questions and that I should find Kate, that she would be
handy to get Xander on our side,’ Viv says as though I should already know.

  ‘Why did they need me on their side?’ Xander asks.

  ‘Because if you were, then Nora would be.’ Miles says. ‘That’s why I brought her here, so she wasn’t misguided.’

  ‘We’re not the bad guys. You are!’ Viv cries.

  And then the question that I've asked her a million times in my head rolls off my tongue. ‘Did you know your people were going to kill them?’

  Viv's eyes widen, they dart side to side trying to piece it all together. ‘My people? They didn’t—’

  I sigh loudly. ‘They did. I saw one of the men who was in our house when Mum and Dad…’ I fall onto the futon, I can never say the words. ‘One of the guards who was there that night five years ago, he was at the caverns yesterday.’

  She gasps and falls to her knees.

  Xander and Miles instinctively kneel with her, Miles looks sideways to Xander and they both nod in stoic reconciliation.

  Viv is quiet, like maybe deep down she knew the truth but didn’t want to accept it. She has no choice but to accept it now.

  ‘Where's Nora, Miles?’ Xander’s tone moves from accusatory to genuine concern.

  Miles shakes his head, ‘I don't know. The Base maybe. She's going to take the orbs I think.’

  ‘How will she take the orbs?’ Xander says, then a second later turns to Ross. ‘Why didn't this orb work?’

  Ross steps away from the wall he had cowered himself against and drops his machine onto the table. ‘You weren't thinking about Miles were you?’

  ‘I was thinking about Nora,’ Xander says frustrated. ‘Then I thought of Miles and how angry I was with him, my friend.’

  ‘I am your friend. I know you want to hate me Xander, but you know you can’t!’

  ‘Yeah… I know… sorry I doubted you, sorry I hit you.’

  I'm not so easy to forgive. ‘It can't be that much of a shock to you Viv. Deep down you knew right?’

  Viv shakes her head.

  I look at her sitting there with her knees curled up to her chest; one side of her face reflect the flames, the other side glows gold from the sun.

  ‘Aww come on.’ Eli says, ‘Vivian: searcher of truths. You're not one to bury your head in the sand.’

  ‘No offense Eli, but you haven't made contact in five years. How would you know who I am now?’

  Eli sighs and looks at Miles. ‘What's the next step?’

  ‘We get Nora,’ Xander says.

  Ross nods. ‘I agree, we should find Nora and bring her back here, safe. Simple.’

  ‘Nora's letter says to wait.’ Miles says waving it around. ‘She won't come back with us. She doesn't need saving. What you all need to understand, is that she is the one saving us!’

  Viv finally stands up. She looks at Miles. ‘Yes, but what is she doing?’

  Eli smirks and nods his head like he's congratulating himself for knowing Viv's real personality, she's finally asking questions again.

  ‘She's putting an end to it all. Palladium. The Uprising,’ Miles lifts his chin. ‘It's her choice.’

  ‘How though? How will she do it? And alone? Really?’ Xander's voice flits between scoff and fear.

  ‘I don't know, it was up to her to figure it out. This note gives me as much information about where she is and what she is doing. And yes, she needs to do it alone. I hate the words I'm saying. I wish Nora had told me she was going—let me go with her. If I'm next to her… if we're next to her we have the opportunity to protect her at least, there'd be less of a risk to lose her.’

  ‘Wait, you said she was going to take the orbs?’ Viv wipes the tears off her face and stands up, the whole room shifts with her movement. ‘From the Base?’

  ‘Look… you can stare at me with your righteous eyes, you can chain me up in your tethers of mistrust, you can lump me inside a pit with my father, but I will never let you make me even begin to consider I've done the wrong thing with giving Nora the orb.’

  A whole new world of confusion and questions kick start my brain. ‘What orb?’

  ‘Uh,’ Miles stammers like he didn't mean to let us know. ‘It's a special orb, like all the orbs rolled into one... sort of.’

  ‘Are you kidding me?’ Ross salivates at the news.

  Miles winces and digs his teeth into the crusted blood lump on his lip.

  ‘Will she be going to the Base?’ Viv's tone changes, she speaks monotone and low.

  ‘Yeah, I assume so,’ Miles mirrors her inflection.

  Viv sighs, she looks as though the whole world weighs down on her shoulders. I feel bad for her now I know she didn’t know about my parents. The conflict in her mind must be difficult. And I've been hard on her, she cared for me when I had no one else.

  She opens her mouth to speak but shuts it again. Her eyebrows lower over her eyes as she scans the room.

  ‘Viv?’ A pang of worry fills my chest. ‘What?’

  ‘It's…’ She bites down on her lip hard in one last attempt to stay silent. This is it, this is her chance to show me where her allegiance lies. She shakes her head and looks to Miles. ‘I thought it would be different once they arrived you know, that I could convince her the Uprising were right… that she would convince Xander and you. Why did you have to get to her first?’

  ‘What do you know, Viv? If there's something at the Base that endangers Nora, you need to tell us!’ With every word that Miles speaks, Ross, Xander, Eli and I inch closer, urging Viv.

  She stays silent for a while.

  ‘Right, that’s it,’ Xander holds the portal orb and it sends waves of light to the roof. ‘I’m finding her!’

  ‘Wait!’ Miles yells, but it’s too late—Xander is gone without even glancing my way.

  Tears fall unashamed down Viv’s face without inhibition. ‘She loves Xander you know, you never stood a chance, he'll find her and she'll come back with him.’

  ‘What if she doesn't?’ Miles doesn't let her taunts affect his stance. ‘Please trust me Viv. I remember that day, your fists pounding desperately on my chest, begging me to let you run to Seth. If I had let you go, you would be dead right now. Don't you know that?’

  He reaches his hand out to her.

  ‘Don't touch me,’ she steps back whispering, ‘I hate you!’

  Eli steps closer to Viv and swoops an arm around her back and pulls her in close to him. ‘It's OK Viv. Don't do this for him, do it for Nora.’

  ‘I made promises… oaths to my family!’ She sobs into Eli's chest.

  ‘Viv?’ I trill beside them. ‘Do you remember when we were walking by the river down near the Corridor and you were telling me how it all worked and what time I'd need to set it for? You tripped on a stick and I laughed for the first time since you found me. Do you remember? Before I took the tablet, I was nervous and you told me to think of Xander—that he wasn't only a brother to me, he was a brother to you, that Nora was a sister to you, that I was a sister to you… We are your highly dysfunctional family!’

  Viv pulls her tear stained face away from Eli. ’It's not that simple! It's not that simple!’ She chants as she runs towards the cabin door. She opens it and turns towards us, she wipes a tear off her flushed face, ‘I'm sorry.’

  THIRTY-NINE

  Nora

  Setting foot on the old Base brings me both joy and confusion. I smell the distinct aroma of Xander's deodorant, I hear laughter and spirited conversations, I feel excited and curious and blissfully overwhelmed. At the same time, I feel sadness that those feelings are only memories, happenings that will never have the chance to occur again. Because of me and what I'm doing.

  I walk through the stark hallways, past the transparent laboratories and into the main hall. I look up to the floors stretched above and around me, what once was a building full of life and possibility is now silent… Why is it silent? Why is there nobody here?

  ‘Stop right there!’

  If I had the chance to prepare myself, I would have. I wou
ld have clenched the orb tight and made myself disappear. But instead, my hands are thrust behind my back and my knees are kicked out from under me. I fall to the floor and the shock of the impact is jarring. Fingers dig deep into my wrists; I see two shiny black loafers on the floor in front of me. My head is ripped upwards by a hand full of my hair. I expect to see Ladlow standing in front of me, but it's not him.

  ‘Who are you?’ He is tall and commanding but his glasses give him a sort of benevolence.

  ‘Nora!’ I answer. ‘And you're hurting me!’

  ‘Let her go, Frank!’ The man demands. ‘For goodness sake, she is not the enemy!’ My hair and hands feel a sudden rush of relief.

  ‘Nora? I've heard of you. My name is Professor Nichols, but you can call me David!’ He smiles and holds his hand out to me.

  I imagine myself spitting in his palm and screaming. “I'll just call you psycho, shall I?”

  I turn to look at Frank, he has three other big men at his side. I rub my wrists and scramble to my feet on my own.

  ‘Independent, I like that,’ David says as he drapes an arm around my shoulders. ‘Come with me.’

  I follow them towards the portal orb elevator, it seems the Base had an overhaul of technology too. We exit at the food hall and I find out exactly why downstairs was so quiet. Everyone sits in a row along the right wall, where we normally line up for dinner. They are surrounded by half a dozen men with guns. I'm led by Frank to the opposite side of the room towards a pile of mobile phones. He bends over in front of me and feels around my ankles, he runs his thick hands up my body and digs his fingers inside my pant pockets. I start to shake as I think about the orb in my jacket pocket.

  ‘I'll do this if you like?’ A young boy pushes Frank aside. He smiles at me.

  Frank laughs winking at me. ‘Sure Adam, go right ahead, enjoy yourself!’

  Adam checks the outside pocket of my jacket. I don't mean to, but I gasp. He pulls the jacket open, pats my stomach and feels around my bra. His fingers fumble around my collar and I feel the orb bang against my ribs. His hand starts running down the inside of my jacket, I look down and see the small bump the orb makes in the lining. He must see it too. Adam pauses. I hold my breath, should I warn him that if he touches it he'll get hurt. It will cause a scene. People could get hurt. I close my eyes and swallow hard.